11 mei 2017

The actionplan for EFT relationship therapy

Actionplan relational therapy EFT

IN SEVEN STEPS TO A LOVELY RELATIONSHIP

Do you want expert counseling to work with your relationship problems?
These steps are based on the EFT model of Dr. Sue Johnson, Relationship Therapist and Writer of, among others, the book “Hold Me Tight.”

In the first conversation we investigate the causes of your relationship problems
When did they originate? What are the effects from the outside?

Step 1
Detecting corrupt patterns of accusation and removal and learning
How do we react to each other?
From what time did we suddenly react to each other more negatively? What did I do and what did my partner do then?

Step 2
Detecting pains
What vulnerability, such as anger, fear, pain or sadness, lies under our behavior?
Feelings that determine our behavior usually do not show us and we are not aware of this.
If you are able to show your fear of loss and isolation, you can easily talk about your needs and desire for more affection and affiliation. This revelation then moves us to respond with more tenderness and empathy to the own needs and vulnerabilities of the other. This creates emotional attachment that we really desire. This creates openness and understanding for each other, so that love can begin to flow again.

Step 3
Account for your role in your deteriorated relationship
What do I do because the relationship does not get affectionate? Often we tend to blame the other, which can lead us to, for example, in the role of victim or critic.

Step 4
Develop empathy and connectivity
For the ‘hurt’ partner it is important to see that the “hurting” partner feels the pain he or she has done to the other.

Step 5
Show repentance & forgiveness
Old very or painful events (called relationship trauma), which can play an obtrusive role in the relationship, are explored and processed together. Admit ‘mistakes’ and sincerely regret, make the way free for the other to forgive.

Step 6
Confidence and intimacy
When you are open and honest to each other, there is more trust and intimacy in your relationship. The band you have built up can strengthen you through physical contact, such as touches and sex. Emotional connectivity leads to (physical) intimacy.

Step 7
Keeping love alive
Practical tips, assignments and handles to stay away from your pitfalls.

Progress
Depending on your progress, some steps will go faster than others.

Aftercare
To walk through the above steps, it is important to continue to pay attention to the relationship.
After completing this course, I offer aftercare. This means that we will see each other again and repeat a step where necessary.